Ready To Try

I've been thinking a lot about my internship lately. I was talking to someone the other day about it, and they asked me "Do you really think you can make a difference?" All I could respond was "I can try."
So I'm sitting at work tonight, reading True Notebooks, as part of an assignment for my corrections class. The book is a true account of a man who teaches a writing class for violent offenders at a juvenile detention center. The very last page of the book was a poem written to the author by one of the inmates. It left me a little emotional....

DEAR FRIEND

Hello there old friend

At the moment I'm kind of down

It seems as though this is the end

I haven't had the chance to see you around.

I've been sitting here bereft,

Alone, locked down

But now I have a window

And see you every night.

Times are hard, but i'll be alright.

Gun towers, barbed wire is all I see

No matter how far I travel

I glance up, and there you'll be.

Its good to have a friend like you

At times you help me shine through.

I still have a long journey to go

But I'll be free again

I'll use this time to grow

In not just one way, but all

There's a lot for me to learn

So I'm gonna start like a baby, with a crawl.

Though the road may seem

Long and far

Eventually I'll make it

Dear old friend, North Star

Salzman, M. (2003) True notebooks. New York: Alfred A. Knopf.

So I don't know the likelihood that I could have this kind of affect on my mentee. But I do want to try. I guess reading this book makes me understand what I'm feeling. I've felt so lost sometimes. Knowing that I have this chance and I'm going to be part of this program makes me feel like I'm finally doing something I can really be proud of. I've finally found a real challenge, not something I can fake my through and still succeed. Maybe that is why it's so crucial to me to do this well.... I want to know that I am capable of something real....